Overcoming The Fear Of Success

How to overcome fear with competitiveness.

Do you have a fear of success? Or is it just a feeling of inadequacy or maybe even fear of man?

I thought I used to have a "fear of success" but motivational speaker 'Brian Tracy' helped me understand that there is no such thing as a fear of success... (Think About it)

I used to play basketball regularly just for fun, just for a hobby, just for sport and sometimes I would play the best games of my life. I would shoot so well, and in the mist of my shooting I would give up the ball. Not Because I saw better options on the court, but because of my Thoughts;

"maybe you should share the ball more” 
“you’ve got ahead of yourself Jake, calm down”
“you don't work as hard as these guys to be good at this game"

This is not a "fear of success" it's a feeling of inadequacy, it's self sabotage. It's feeling as if you don't deserve this Good thing because you haven't "earnt it" in your own eyes. But you don't always win because you deserve it, sometimes you win because what you love doing is paying you back, bearing fruit for all the years you've loved it.

"Practice is not always boring"

In fact if we only did what we loved doing in life (not necessarily what we enjoy) but what we love and stopped chasing money and "Stability" we'd excel in every area and enjoy "good success" as the good book calls it.

If someone was going to quiz you on a loved ones behaviour you would ace the test because you have loved this person, not because you've "practiced" for it.

Malcolm Gladwell calls it meaningful work.

I remember I never became truly competitive until the day I walked into what I thought was a pickup basketball game in a small indoor caught, only big enough for 4 vs 4 games. There were about 20-25 of us.

4 captains were chosen who then lined up the rest of us against the wall and proceeded to choose or draft their favourite players. It felt like a nightmare at gym class i.e. P.E class.

That night I was not one of the chosen unfortunately, and I wasn't chosen second to last... I wasn’t even the last pick, Nope I wasn't chosen at all 😔...🙈

Not even chosen out of charity, 

I literally was the last man standing in a hall of ballers, standing there just lingering and lingering... Until I drifted onto a team that were willing to have this "Dead weight" just hang around.

These guys didn't respect me... they didn't even value me as a human being enough to pretend to pick me at the end. I've never been Soo embarrassed, Soo humiliated.

Then something rose up in me, a type of anger that I'd NEVER known... I began speaking to myself in my mind saying from tonight no one on this court is my friend and NOBODY is getting my respect. Nobody matters any more, I don't care. 

That night I played basketball with SUCH an aggression and a competitiveness that I knew NO respect for persons let alone a fear of inadequacy. I knew no fear. I freed myself from "what other people thought of me" I just didn't CARE anymore.

I had no idea that God was using this to get me out of my timidity and to turn me into a MAN. 

I was shooting "lights out" I was scoring at will, I was drawing fouls, I was playing Defence, getting blocks, rebounds and steals, I was even hitting buzzer beaters!

I wasn't embracing anyone between games, I was too focused, I wasn't even angry anymore. I just didn't care if someone said "well done, or what are you doing?" it was my life, my game and my session.

After this semi tournament of games I was calm but focused, and extremely pleased with myself, I felt empowered.

As I walked out of the gym my comrades congratulated with bemusement saying "well done" and even threw in some congratulations about my music saying "well done in your new music video, and the way you played tonight, well done for everything"

This was a pivotal moment in my life and affected the way I do everything from then on and the beauty of it is now I'm highly competitive but I know how and where to leave my competitiveness once the task is over.

I use competitiveness to succeed, I don't let it use me. 

And I still see the people I played with that night, often in fact, but I don't remember any of those who didn't pick me, I just remember the faces of those who congratulated me at the end.

Bible Scripture: “Fear Of Man Is A DANGEROUS Trap, but trusting in the Lord means safety” Proverbs 29:25